New Days?

I managed to dispel the strange characters appearing in my title box. Whoohoo.
It's so cold and early it's difficult to think. I don't even know why I'm updating my blog. So yesterday was a good day. I have this overwhelmingly daunting feeling that all this good is going to come back tenfold. All good things come to an end. It's sort of like ecstasy or meth...once you go up, and then you go down, life sucks and isn't the same. I live in fear of the moment where life will start to go downhill.

Why does life have to be so complicated? Am I the one making it that way?

Looking back through my past blog posts from various high school years, I am reminded of the fact that I still have yet to acquire a passion. I find it very attractive and motivational on other people when they are fully committed and passionate about what they are doing. Passion is something that I lack in my life, but then arises another query. Is it absolutely necessary to be passionate? It is obvious that many people in the world don't have a direction or commitment in their life. Are these happy people?

I'm constantly afraid of the shadows that dwell in the shadows in my life [that is a tunnel]. lol that was a bit corny. But either way, I hate surprises because either I'm not prepared for them or because I don't know that its coming. The majority of the time, surprises are negative.

I realize that I talk about myself in this blog a lot. Haha, oh well, fuck you.

=listen=