I really want to start doing more crafts. How is it that I'm always uncertain, yet so confident at other times. Why must I always contradict myself? I get so angry and irritated at my mom, but I feel bad at the same time that the way
she is, is the way she is. My life is derived from hers, yet I get so irritated day after day, and I sometimes don't know how to deal with it besides slamming my fist into the door, or shouting at the top of my lungs. I suppose I'm pretty irresponsible in the sense that these are brief tantrums and I should be able to deal with things like this in an adult manner but...*sighs*.
Anyway, I made chocolate chip cupcakes and they're very bitter, but my brother and mom like them so I guess my taste buds are lacking in judgement skills. I didn't use self-rising flour, nor did I use fine sugar. Today I just stayed home and did nothing.
I talked to Harry on google chat for a while, but that was really just the peak of my interaction with other human beings. My grandpa tried to engage me in a little lecture, but I just ended up nodding and slowly inching my way out of the kitchen. He was telling me how my cousin Joy got a job even before she graduated and "that's the way it's suppose to be", you know the normal Chinese spiel. He also said that being and engineer was "steady" and "good", not as good as being a doctor (and that's verbatim). Apparently being a doctor requires you to be "loving" and "gentle", and you'll be able to a good doctor if you can do those things. I added as I walked out that you must be very smart too, and he heartily agreed.
I didn't leave my house at all today, I feel; like a sloth. If I had a a pedometer on today I probably would have seen that I walked less than 100 steps, when the normal "healthy" number of steps would be 10,000. How sad, I pity myself.
My aunt gave me these awesome boots from her aunt (my great-aunt), and there are three exact pairs in three different colors. They're knee high, and a little bit difficult to wear because my feet are larger than my aunt and great-aunts. Whatever, I'll break them in.
Yesterday I didn't post because I was so exhausted from hanging out with my aunt and volunteering with Perry and Jane. We didn't really do anything and really overall boring, but in the end we got a mass load free bagels, and many soda's. There was a lot of leftover food. I also got a free t-shirt. I don't even think that we were slacking off. I saw the some ROTC people volunteering from Wash- Pilot, Maten, Jaz...and their friends.
I really wanted to make ice cream today, but I was stuck at home all day, with no means of transportation. I wish that I could ride my bike across the freeway, or even better, that I had a sense of direction so I could bike to Bart.
Life sucks balls,